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Kiss and Tell: Knowing He was “The One”


If you ask a little girl who she plans to marry someday, she won’t have a name to give you (except for maybe a celebrity crush); she’ll only know that he’ll be “the one”, the mysterious man that every girl expects to find one day, that will sweep her off her feet and make her fall madly in love. But how can you tell Mr. Right from Mr. Right Now? These are the stories of women who have found their “one”.


“Less than a month after I met Sean, one of my best friends killed himself. I was completely destroyed. Sean took it all in stride, went to a funeral of a guy he never met, held me as I sobbed harder than I ever have, and spent the entire night with my friends and I. That night, when we finally went home, he piggy backed me up a half mile driveway because my feet were hurting. That night, as he carried me up the driveway, I knew he was it for me. He cared more about me in less than a month than any ex had in a year.” – Rebecca, 20

“When I looked into his eyes the first time, I was gone. I knew that my heart was no longer in my chest because I had given it to him. It was all the little things that added up. When I screwed up and he still wanted me (even when I didn’t want myself). When I met his family, I already felt a part of it. When he held a child and I knew I wanted it to be ours he was holding (that was a big hint). Justin’s honorable and stubborn and accepts me the way that I am. His eyes turn my head into mush, my stomach into knots, my chest into butterflies. Even after all this time, all it takes is one look and I’m a goner. He looks at me with love in his eyes, even when he doesn’t know that’s how he is looking at me.” – Rachel, 25

“I knew Chris was the one when I was having a really bad visit from Aunt Flo… He walked, IN THE SNOW, to the store to get me pads, but came back with Tylenol, Midol, a heating pad, tea, a chocolate bar, a bag of pretzels, and some ice cream too. This was accomplished in two trips – WALKING IN THE SNOW. We had been together before, friends on and off, but this was when I knew I would stay with him for good. Anyone can relate to their partner being sick, but guys can’t relate to our female problems and he took really good care of me anyway.” – Kassi, 34

“The first five minutes we spent alone together altered the course of my entire life, and it happened during the darkest time in my life. The air in the car felt electric as we drove to a restaurant and talked about everything I had been through, and as we caught up on each other’s lives…We flirted as we walked. It was intellectual and politically elevated conversation. His mind kept perfect pace with my wit and we had amazing back and forth. We went back to his apartment to keep catching up and have some wine. Every inch between us on the couch made me feel like I was in agony and I had to be touching him somehow. I had never felt that drawn to someone. It knocked me off my feet… As soon as he realized there was something special between us, he spent every second pursuing me or being there or me in any way I needed until I trusted him inch by inch a little more with my broken heart. He held me when I cried. He cooked me dinner when I was so depressed I didn’t feel like getting out of my pajamas. He made me my favorite desert from my kindergarten cafeteria and walked around the park eating it with me. He exposed the rawest parts of himself to me, and when I did the same to him, confiding in him highly personal things, he cried and said I was the most beautiful soul he had ever met.
“He asked me to be his girlfriend three different times before I said yes. I knew he was the one because he is the only person who has ever truly seen me, all of me, who I am, without even trying. He isn’t afraid of my dark parts and he celebrates my light. I trust him more than anything and that trust was forged during a time when all my trust was broken. I have the utmost respect for this man, for his determination and love for me, and for how important our relationship is to him. He is everything I have ever needed, and now that I know what it’s like to be with him, no one else could ever compare. The level of mutual respect, pleasure, attraction and pure, mature love we have for one another is it for me. I have never felt so free. I would go through every bit of pain my last relationship put me through all over again to get to who I am with now. It’s that fulfilling.” – Danica, 22

“I realized  it wasn’t a particular moment but a bunch of little things. It’s how he fits right in with my crazy family, how he deals with me at my worst, can make me laugh, how forgiving he is when I make a mistake (which is a lot), and look at me with loving eyes and make me melt. I don’t think “the one” is about a singular moment but all the moments strung together to show how dependent and loving the person you care for can actually be. And then how I know I would do anything for that guy not because it would get me something but because of how much I know I care about him. Which is a scary feeling but amazing to know that a feeling like this actually exists.” – Alyssa, 20

“Luther and I met at LMU in 1985. We had a class together, and he says he thought I was a know-it-all. We had mutual friends but didn’t get to really know each other until February 12, 1986, Lincoln Day. I fell for him that night. When we got back to our dorm room I told my best friend/roommate, “I am going to marry that boy.” It took a little longer for him to come to the same conclusion. We began dating in May. We became engaged in September, and we got married on December 27th of 1986. Things haven’t been perfect, I don’t believe they ever are, but we are still deeply in love and committed to one another. He was my first lover, and I was his. After being together for 28 years he still surprises me with how sweet and caring he can be. Yes, he is sometimes a total bonehead, but sometimes I’m a total shrew. But we work at our marriage and forgive each other. I hope we have another couple of decades together to see our two adult children married with families of their own. I cannot and don’t want to imagine my life without him.” –Julia, 47

“Around five months after we started dating, I had a crisis and broke up with him. Throughout the month we were apart he continued to love me and help me work through my issues and be supportive. When we got back together, I knew I would never look back because he is the one who will be there for me always. On the corny side… I told my best friend the first day I met Jared that I was going to marry him one day, so maybe a part of me knew from the beginning.” – Ashley, 21

“I was living up in Knoxville, life was great. Then I lost my job, so things had to change. I couldn’t afford a $620 apartment without a job. So I called Brad [my brother], crying my eyes out cause I had no idea what I was gonna do. He says come live with me when the month is up. So I did. I moved down on his birthday. And of course he had a party going on. One of his other friends told me of this guy named “Mike” that had to drive Brad back from the boat dock cause he was feeling sick. And I said that was a really sweet thing of him to do, where was he? I wanted to thank him for taking such good care of my brother. Lo and behold, he had left and I thought, well, I’m sure we’ll see more of him, I’ll thank him later. Next night rolls around, I’ve cleared me a space in Brad’s room and I even cleaned the kitchen so I could make dinner for everybody. After I got done cooking tacos, I walked into the living room, which was a complete disaster zone from the night before. Mike told me to go into the kitchen and get everything plated and he’d fix it. He cleaned the whole living room, and then came into the kitchen and carried everything in there for me. From that point on, I knew he’d do anything to make me happy and do everything to keep me from being sad. It’s weird, I’ve never loved someone so much. We’ve never had a knock down drag-out fight; we’re always happy. And the way he looks at [our son] every day, makes me love him more. He’s such a great father and the love of my life.” – Bridgett, 21

“Bobby and I had encountered each other at Packards several times while I was in high school. We actually tag teamed hooking up some friends of ours. Then once I was in college I needed a job, and so in my free time while job searching I hung around Packards. He hired me on. We got to know each other over months of working together. Us and the guys gamed together. We were friends. Then we decided to go to the movies together. It just clicked. It worked. It’s worked ever since. We game together. We watch action flicks together. He has the sweetest little boy, and is such a great father. He’s ok with my bullheadedness and sometimes less than delicate behavior.” – Brandy, 20

“We’ve been married so long I can’t remember the moment. I can tell you that we dated about a year and my mother came out and said that he was no good and I needed to quit seeing him! Well, that made me mad and I just up and asked Allan, “Do you want to get married?” He said “OK” and two weeks later we married!” –Tanja, 60

“Well, I wasn’t quite sure Dan was the one until just now actually, as I am laying in bed listening to him whistle “Let it Go” from Frozen…” – Victoria, 21

“It was Christmas break. We hadn’t seen each other in ages, like once in the past two years because our colleges were two hours apart. But we had been joking about how, in high school, we had never made it through a single movie without some kind of “interruption,” so we made it a dare that time. We had just finished Underworld: Rise of the Lycans, and I was standing by the door, watching it snow, trying to figure out an excuse not to have to leave. He came up behind me, not saying a word for a few moments, before touching my back, and saying, “You know, it’s dangerous to drive in the snow. You could stay here tonight.” We weren’t even together back then. It took him another year after that to finally ask me out. But when people ask me when I knew, I think back to that barely sticking snow.” –Katie, 21

No matter the story, one thing stays true throughout them all: There isn’t one defining moment that occurs across the board, but rather something special that clues you in that this man is the one for you. What’s your story? Come on, you can kiss and tell.

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